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Luigi is a WANTED article!

This means it is among the best UnAnything has to offer! It has been WANTED as of June 2013! Treat it with respect! Go here to see all WANTED articles.

Oops! Maybe you're looking for the stupid version of Luigi.

Luigi Mario
Mad Luigi.jpg

Luigi is pissed

Gender: Male (we think)
Hair color: Same as Mario
Eye color: Same as Mario
Species: Whatever Mario is
Home: Mario's house, Mushroom Kingdom
Death: Respawns
AKA: Mario's Lesser
Likes: Being better than Mario
Dislikes: His current life
Education: Less than Mario's
Occupation: Mario's sidekick
Known For: Helping Mario
UnRank: 94

Luigi is a character in nine out of ten Mario shames, and is also usually considered to be the biggest loser that has ever been on Earth (though this is up to debate, as there are lots of losers, and sometimes he can be heroic). He is Mario's long lost brother. Some think this is a rumor, but they are stupid. He was first known to the public by appearing in the shame Malleo is Missing.



Luigi was born July 8th, 1981. Though this is Mario's birthday, and they are brothers, they are not twins. We still don't know why. Mario was taken away because he had a mustache, and Luigi was forgotten, as though he also had a mustache, it was stupid and lame compared to Mario's. He crawled off to hide. He didn't realize he was crawling onto a plane, and he somehow ended up in Loompaland. He had to fight his way through its dangerous jungles until he found the Oompa Loompas.

Oompa Loompas

Luigi lived with the Oompa Loompas for many years. They raised him, taught him how to to talk, read, write, bathe, and prepare five star meals. Well, not really, but he got by. He was actually starting to turn into an Oompa Loompa. He got an addiction to green clothes like the Oompa Loompas do, and he turned orange for a while (though some believe this was actually a fatal disease Luigi was lucky to survive).

Luigi as a child

After living with the Oompa Loompas for 26 years (making Luigi 26 years old), Luigi realized they were planning on eating him. They were actually planning a buffet in his honor, but he didn't know that. He shot all of the Oompa Loompas dead, except, he didn't have a gun. Then, he left right as Willie Wonka approached the scene. Luigi ran off to Mushroom Kingdom, where he was born.

Mushroom Kingdom

Luigi after becoming famous.

Luigi spent many years trying to find his birthplace, and he eventually found Mushroom Kingdom the same day Mario returned. After they created Super Mario Cookies, Luigi became almost as famous as Mario, despite the fact there were no Super Luigi cookies, just Mario cookies dipped in green paint.

Luigi is now famous, he has met his long lost brother, and he just found a free Real Pie on the ground. His life was complete. So, this is the part where Mario fell asleep for hundreds of years, and everyone forgot about Mario and Luigi. Luigi sank to the bottom of the food chain, and some Magikarp came up and ate him.

He tasted terrible, so the Magikarp regurgitated him a little bit later. Realizing he had nowhere else to go, he decided he would try to take over Mushroom Kingdom. He killed the king, but then the king's son took over. He killed this king, so Princess Peach took over. He tried to kill her, but he was out of ammo, so he just smacked her with his gun, and left.

Luigi was put in jail for 250 years. When he was released, he discovered Mario was awake. They both teamed up again, and got jobs at Nintendo. Well, that's about it on Luigi's boring life. And more importantly, you just wasted a little chunk of your life reading it!


  • あなたは、日本からの場合は、ルイージはトップではありません。
    • Translation: If you are from Japan, Luigi is not the top.

List of Stupid Thing About Luigi

  • He's pathetic.
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  • He's stupid!
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