UnRank
An UnRank is a rank given to every creature of the UnUniverse. This rank is considered very important. The owner of the highest UnRank is Chuck Norris. The rank in question is Infinity (but that's an understatement; we all know that he is BEYOND that rank, and that's insane). The owner of the lowest UnRank is Elf Bowling: The ALIVE Movie, because the movie is alive and it sucks. The owner of the 2nd lowest UnRank is Wii, because they took away 22 of El Idiotico's Wii bowling skill points. Not fair!
Contents
Table of Ranks[edit]
Rank | Description | Status |
Above infinity | The God of Minds | Everybody refers to you as the "Divine Sacrosanct with Prestige" |
Infinity | Infinitely Amazing | You are considered beyond god-ship. You get what you want AT ALL TIMES. |
10^12+ | Godlike | You are a god, obviously. |
386,329,303,920 - 10^12 | Unfathomably Phenomenal | You are so outstanding that we had to use two big words to describe you. |
1,000,000,000 - 386,329,303,920 | Supreme Being | "Know your place, minority..." |
1,000,049 - 1,000,000,000 | Beyond Legendary | At this point, not even the most powerful meme master can defeat you. |
540,200 - 1,000,049 | Legendary | You are the stuff of legends. |
24,000 - 540,200 | Epic Level III | You are the highest level of epic before you enter legends. |
3,500 - 24,000 | Epic Level II | You are far into the art of epicness. |
564 - 3,500 | Epic Level I | You are epic. |
150 - 564 | Above Average | You are above the regular moron. |
100 - 150 | Not Bad | You're kind of cool. |
80 - 100 | Not Awesome | You're not the greatest person ever, not really average either. |
50 - 80 | Lame | You suck. |
20 - 50 | Amazingly Low | Maybe you should go lock yourself up. |
10 - 20 | REALLY?! | You have got to be kidding me. |
1 - 10 | Wow... | You should have been dead by now. |
0 | ZERO | You are not worth the dirt you walk on. |
Negatives | Beyond redemption. | The poster would rather want you dead than alive. You are so bad that your worth is basically a tiny speck of void dust, and even that is an understatement. |
Negative Infinity | You REALLY suck | Calling you the worst person ever to ever live would be a compliment, it does not begin to describe how hated you are by everyone. |
Below Negative Infinity | The Farthest From Zero | You are worse than Captain 1. |
Status In the UnUniverse[edit]
The UnRank is considered extremely important, and often decides the social status of the owner. Someone with very high level UnRanks are considered very important, while people with lower ranks are considered losers.
Decision of Ranks[edit]
For Normal People[edit]
Most UnRanks are awarded by the UnGovernment, and they are always accurate. Ranks are examined constantly, and if someone suddenly becomes awesome, their rank may change though this is rare. A known example of this is Mister Kooper2.
For Undefeatables[edit]
In addition to a normal UnRank, there is also a separate ranking system for Undefeatables, which is used to either grant a new Undefeatable initiation or depose someone who is currently undefeatable. The system used for this is the UnRank Scales, which stand in front of the Undefeatables' palace. A prospective Undefeatable stands on one of its massive weighing dishes while a veteran Undefeatable (usually one who has been unruly and is in danger of being rejected), stands on the other. Then, Chuck Norris himself strikes the top of the scales, sending a powerful vibration coursing through them. If the prospective Undefeatable stays on their feet, they are admitted into the ranks of the Undefeatables. Out of millions of challengers since the dawn of creation, only a few dozen have stood on the scales and lived to tell the tale.