1st Ducky War

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Ducky, instigator of the war

The 1st Ducky War was a war where the evil hand puppet Ducky decided he wanted to RULE THE WORLD. He succeeded at first and established The Ducky Empire, which still exists to this day.


Map of all the places involved in the war.

Outbreak of the War (March - May 2001)[edit]

The outbreak of the war in March 2001 came as a shock for everyone, but following Ducky's semi-victory, he released the following list of reasons:

1. Handpuppets were always mistreated.

2. He wanted more cash.

3. He wanted to RULE THE WORLD!!!!!!

4. Coca-Cola was getting TOO expensive and he wanted it for free.

5. He was bored.

6. He wanted to rule more stuff than Porky.

The outbreak was described as vicious by contemporary chroniclers. Ducky gained supporters and the resulting mob sacked a town held by a local governor. Ducky then laughed maniacally with his victory. It was actually Mister Kooperton who started this war.

1st invasion of the Squadala Empire (May - August 2001)[edit]

After establishing the Empire of Ducky, the cunning Handpuppet made his first mistake. In May 17, 2001, He tried to invade the Squadala Empire with a force of only two thousand troops who had little training. They were swiftly defeated with Ducky feeling very stupid all of a sudden. When The Squadala Empire retaliated however, Ducky repulsed their force with little effort, And Germany started to send trained soldiers at the Ducky Empire (he is rumored to have yelled FUS RO DAH at the approaching army, but he says he just fired a M249 machine gun at them.)

Invasion of the Mushroom Kingdom (September 2001 - August 2002)[edit]

Ducky quickly rebuilt his forces and tried to invade the southern half of the Mushroom Kingdom while Germany was invading there as well, killing many Goombas and Toads in the process. He was initially repulsed due to the Fire Flowers, but then Ducky and the Germans started using their own Fire Flowers, resulting in a draw. The southern half of the Mushroom Kingdom was returned at the end of the war.

The Final Battle (October 15, 2002)[edit]

As Ducky was recovering from his (semi) successful invasion of the Mushroom Kingdom, he was invaded by 3 million soldiers from the Squadala Empire and 5 million soldiers from Germany. Ducky quickly made an alliance with Sparta (which stands to this day) and borrowed 300 of their soldiers. The Squadala and German Armies were quickly destroyed, and a peace treaty was signed allowing Ducky to keep his empire.

Results of the War[edit]

Ducky founded the Ducky Empire, remaining a threat to the Squadala Empire.

Sparta became allies with the Ducky Empire, both loaning each other 300 soldiers every year or so.

Fire Flowers now grow in the Ducky Empire and Germany.

No one knows how many Goombas died, but most historical estimates agree that at least 12 million lost their lives.

Ducky laughed maniacally.

The 2nd Ducky War happened three years later.

You were born.